Setbacks.

Just last week, I was so exhausted from working two jobs, I was in tears. I felt downright defective because I couldn't handle the stress, and I debated quitting one of my jobs. I couldn't decide which one, as they both have their ups and downs, and honestly, the extra money from working both of them made the stress worthwhile. I gave myself a goal to work towards to pay off some bills, and I knew I could get through the next couple months with that goal in mind.

My dear husband and I had a long conversation. He shocked me and thrilled me to pieces by telling me we could put half my check from the clinic every two weeks into my business account. He said because it's time taken away from my business, it seemed only fair to put some of the money back into the business. I was shocked because I didn't think my husband had that attitude towards my business, especially regarding the money aspect. I was thrilled because there were supplies and other items I've been needing for awhile now. With those thoughts in mind, I knew I could definitely get through the stress of the next few months.

This week, I lost one of my jobs.

I suspected that the clinic wasn't doing very well financially. That was confirmed when he took me into the office and told me it was financially impossible for him to keep me on. I was very strong; I managed not to burst into tears until I was in my car. It doesn't matter that he told me it was nothing I did, it still feels like my fault. If I felt defective before, it's nothing like how defective I feel now. I guess one of the things that bothers me is the fact that the choice was taken away from me. Something happened that was completely out of my control. I should have been able to make the choice to quit one of my jobs, and choose which one. Honestly, I would have kept the clinic job and quit the retail one.

Part of me is somewhat relieved. I'll have more time to spend with my husband, on my business, on myself. But of course, the other part looks at the financial issues. I was looking forward to paying off some bills and getting out of debt. With my husband's promise in mind, I've already bought several supplies and other items on credit, and now I need to figure out how to pay that off. I guess the upside to this is that the supplies are already on their way, and I'll have more time to turn those supplies into amazing and fun new pieces. In the end, I can't help what happened; all I can do is move on and try to make the best of it. I'll probably try to apply at a few other places, but until something works out, I'll throw myself completely into the business and see where it takes me.

If you, my awesome friends, family, and fans, want to help me out in any way, you know what to do - support the business by making a purchase or spreading my store and/or fanpage to those who might like it. Every sale I make goes right back into the business and gives me a much-needed boost of confidence. Sorry to shamelessly self-promote, but I think you can understand it right now. Just remember that Mardi Gras is coming up, and I'm sure you have a party to go to or bar plans or something fun you might need a mask or accessory for! You know how much I love to do custom orders too! :)

In other news, to help myself feel a little better, I went out and got my tongue pierced. I needed to do something a little crazy. I'm just now starting to eat solid food again; how exciting is that? Lol.

Listening to: Zeromancer (Chrome Bitch is a really good angry-mood song; it's been on repeat since Thursday.)
Pics: My tongue piercing, and a few Mardi Gras masks to get you in the mood :)

Yay!

I finally took some pictures and got to listing more items for my shop. As of one minute ago, I now have 100 items in my shop. Each item is something unique and different, and each one is something I'm proud of. I still have many more not yet listed, but I think I'll take a break.

I'd love to get my listings back down to a more manageable amount... so I can turn around and list more, of course. You know how to help me do that - buy buy buy, lol, or at least spread the word to those who might like to buy!

Aaah, it's actually quite relaxing to spend some time adjusting photo sizes, writing up descriptions, getting things all set up. Almost as relaxing as the crafting itself. It helps renew my sense of purpose. It's been a long work week, full of stress and drama and snow and general ickiness. I have another long week coming after only one day off. I plan to thoroughly enjoy that day off, and spend it crafting and relaxing, so I can try once again to avoid the ever-closer burnout lurking around the corner.

That's it for today. Back to relaxing... and maybe even some more listing. Who says 100 is enough??

Listening to: The Cruxshadows
Pics: New stuff, of course!

Laziness.

I should be getting ready for work right now. I'm sure I'll get to it... eventually. It doesn't even seem worth going, though I know I need the hours. Because of the slow season, my hours are being cut by a ridiculous amount. I can't skip work, especially since I called in yesterday. I had good reason though; I worked at my other job instead. One less hour, about 10cents more an hour, but more gas to get there. Yes, I have to work today.

I haven't done much in my art room this past month. All the frantic work I did before Christmas caught up with me and made me exhausted, and frankly put me out of the artistic mood. Last night though, knowing I had some projects half-finished, I stepped in the room, cleared off the dust, and got to work. It felt tedious at first, but it didn't take long to get back into the swing. When my friend walked into my house, I didn't want to leave my art room at first. I did, and soon fell into what has become my usual habit - watching old sci-fi shows on the internet as I knit small projects for family and friends. I suppose I could have worse habits. At least I'm still creating. Yet I feel like I'm not paying attention to my business, and that has to change.

I've been telling myself this past month that I don't have time to get into the art room. Two jobs and barely any days off leave me exhausted, and the days I do have off are spent with my husband, whom it feels like I rarely see anymore. Really though, I get home at a decent hour and have a couple mornings off each week. I could be doing a lot more with that time. Instead I let my laziness get in my way. I tell myself, my friends are here, my husband is here, it would be rude to ignore them by working in my art room instead of hanging out with them. Rude? Maybe a little, but there's a tv in my art room, and I could hook the laptop up in there, and if they really wanted to hang, they could hang in there with me. Besides, wouldn't it be rude of them to deny the fact that my business is a business, basically a third job at which I must put in hours if I expect to make any money?

That said, I'm making a renewed effort to get in there and get stuff done. It's been months since I even listed anything new on Etsy. Mardi Gras is coming up soon, and bridal shows are everywhere this time of year. I need to go through the list of craft fairs going on this year and start putting in applications. Being lazy is not an option. I have a list about ten miles long of stuff to do. Maybe that's part of what's been holding me back, that intimidating list. I know that if I take it one step at a time, it doesn't have to be so intimidating.

I have also decided that in the name of networking, I'm sending some care packages of my work to some of my favorite artists/musicians. They are all into artwork, handmade goods, and self-expression; so I'm hoping for a positive result. If they happen to wear something I send them in a picture that happens to end up on the internet, I would be thrilled beyond belief, even if they don't mention my name explicitly. I'll know it's mine, and I will be happy for the exposure. I'm not expecting life-changing results, just the knowledge that my work is out there, hopefully bringing a bit of joy to the recipients.

Now I really really have to get ready for work. What will I be doing after work? Crafting in my art room, of course, and this time I really really mean it.

Listening to: Kim Boekbinder
Pics: None this time, I'm lazy after all. More pics next post, I promise!

Tattoo Tuesday

So you know that tattoo I was talking about awhile ago? The one in honor of my grandpa and grandma, with the ship and the lilies? Yeah... I got tattooed today. It took a lot of saving and resisting the urge to spend all that Christmas money, and two hours of pain, but it was worth all of it. I am so thrilled with every inch of it. My tattooer, Aaron, is amazing and really brought it to life. http://www.evolutioninked.com/

Other than that, there's not too much new going on right now. Just keeping busy like always. The Christmas rush may be over, but I'm working on that commission painting in full force now and also preparing for Mardi Gras, coming up soon enough in early March. I plan to have quite a few more masks in the shop; pretty extravagant ones if my ideas come to life like I intend!

I'll keep updating you as I go with those projects. That's all I have to say for now :)

Now Listening To: Aerosmith
Pics: New tattoo of course!

Loving and Loathing Changes

I start a new job tomorrow. I haven't quit my old one, though I did inform the boss of my new job and because of the change of hours was told I'd be "replaced" (though I haven't seen hide nor hair of a replacement yet). I wouldn't mind getting some extra hours by working both jobs, but if I have to quit my old job, oh well. I really won't miss it. I may miss some people, but not the job itself.

I'm nervous to start my new job. It's the first non-retail job I've had since waitressing in high school. I'm nervous and I almost feel like a fake, like I'm trying to work a "grown up" job I'm not grown up enough to do. I have to take out my eyebrow piercing. I have to keep my tattoos covered. I have to wear a uniform of scrubs, since I'm now in the medical field. I don't even get to wear fun scrubs; they have to be white white white. Can you picture me in all white? If you know me... you really can't. Lol. But, on the upside, it will be so much more calm than my retail job. No running in circles til I feel like I'll pass out. No babysitting teenagers who care even less about their job than I do. No dealing with crazies insisting you need to return this discontinued, used, not-even-from-our-store item right now or else! Or else what? They never say, but they always seem ready to climb over the counter and shake you.

So even though I'm nervous, I know things will work out for the best. Working both jobs will be exhausting for however long it lasts, and I probably won't get as much crafting done. It will help out my bills though, and right now that is more important. My business is doing well enough to support itself with little help from my own money these days, but it isn't making enough to count as a "job" just yet. With time, perhaps, but in the meantime, this new job will help out a lot.

Of course, I'm starting it right before Christmas. There couldn't be a worse time to start, in my opinion. I'm already rushing to get my house ready for guests, my presents finished and wrapped and perfect. Ugh, I'm tired just thinking about it. Is Christmas over yet? Soon, soon. Things will be much less stressful next month. I'll have time to relax and breath a little! (Probably not. I have a painting to finish, a bridal craft show coming up, and of course, getting ready for Mardi Gras in early March.) I'd better stop blogging and get back to work, huh? After a long exhausting day at the retail job, knitting in front of a movie sounds like a great way to unwind. Aaaahhh :)

Listening to: Unwoman
Pics: Some of the knitting projects I'm working on!

A Green Holiday

I'll admit, I'm a little bit of a tree-hugging hippie. I do what I can to be environmentally friendly. I am religious about recycling, to the point where I'll correct my dear husband's mistakes. I use a filter on my tap instead of buying bottled water, re-use every scrap of fabric in the house rather than throw it away, look for green household cleansers, and buy organic when I can afford it (not as often as I'd like...). Over the summer, when the opportunity to save gas by driving a moped instead of my car to work, I jumped on it. (I swear, it wasn't just because mopeds are hella fun. Lol.) So I started thinking this year about green holiday practices.

We never had a tree before buying our house, because our apartments were too small. For our first holiday, I insisted on a real tree. My family always used real trees. It was a family experience to pick out a tree and cut it down, and enjoy the pine scent in the house. The next year we had a puppy and kitten running around the house, so we weren't sure how to set up a tree without getting things knocked down or crawled up. Our solution was to buy a plastic tree and hang it from the ceiling. Yep. It was actually a lot of fun, and the pets never touched it, and we got a lot of compliments/jokes from family and friends. This year, I decided to do a bit of research on real trees vs. fake and which is better for the environment. I was a little worried that "murdering" trees would be the worst option. Plastic lasts for years, and live trees have to be regrown. Well, according to this article, http://yhoo.it/4vOvYg , real trees win. As long as you get them from a local sustainable tree farm, they are much better than all the polluting work that goes into making plastics. What am I going to do with my plastic tree? Well, I'll still use it this year. I already bought it, the harm's already done. But when it's time to get rid of it, I won't be buying another.

Do you send out an annual greeting card? Switch to email to get rid of the paper waste. Not many people hang onto cards for more than a few weeks anyway. Instead of buying plastic or paper decorations, go outside and find fallen evergreen branches, pine cones, or any other bits of nature to brighten up your house. Go to a local plant nursery and have a bouquet of seasonal branches and flowers put together. Upgrade to LED lights, and please remember to turn them off every night! I shiver in fright and disgust at the inflatable lawn ornaments people leave running all night long. Your energy bill is already being exhausted by turning on the heat as nights get colder and colder. Speaking of that, run a space heater in one room at a time, or wear slippers and sweaters and cuddle under blankets to keep your heating bill down. As we speak, I'm wearing about five layers, including fingerless gloves so I can still type. Lol.

What about how you wrap your gifts? I hate it when I see mounds of wrapping paper tossed right into the trash after Christmas morning. I recycle it all at my house, but I can't control what happens at other people's houses (though sometimes I try!). Still, re-use is always better than recycling, which is why I like using gift bags. I'll reuse those year after year, until they start to look pretty shoddy. This site, http://bit.ly/foqDdy , has a few other great ideas, including making fabric gift bags (great for a fabric hoarder like me!) or using last year's calendar to wrap gifts in. This http://bit.ly/8t23md site is useful too, with ideas like wrapping gifts in other gifts, like wrapping a wine bottle in a colorful kitchen towel.

Of course, local vs. imported plays a big factor in gifts. Speaking of wine, there are dozens of local wineries to choose from, with unique flavors and styles. You also know what I'm going to say about local artists and crafters! Or... don't give "stuff" at all. Gift cards, cash, or even better, donations to charities. This site http://www.charitygiftcertificates.org/ lets you buy gift cards, and the recipient can use the gift cards to donate to 100+ reputable charities. Even better, go down to any local non-profit place like a soup kitchen, food pantry, humane society, battered women's shelter, or other organization and make a direct contribution to your own community.

That's the end of my preachy post. I don't mean to be pushy, but if we all do our part, we can collectively make a big difference! Use your canvas tote bags while shopping, some stores give you discounts; even Starbucks says on their website that they give a 10cent discount if you bring in a reusable travel mug! Enjoy the holidays and don't get stuck in the snow!

Listening to: The Cure
Pics: Our upside-down Christmas tree! That's it today, as I seem to have lost picture files from our first holiday in the house :(

Craft Fair Stories, Round 1

I've been so busy with work and Christmas presents that I almost forgot to write about how the last craft fair went. Craft fairs really make for interesting stories, especially for burgeoning businesses like mine. So here's a small introduction to what it's like for a handmade vendor in a craft fair.

Most people shopping at a craft fair don't realize just how much the vendor puts into it. As a vendor, not only do I have to pay a booth fee just to be there, but I have to supply a table, a tent for outdoor fairs (which most are), and displays for my items. My husband and I have put a lot of work and money into creating my displays, and we've had some hits but a lot of misses trying to figure out what works best.

The first display we made was long dowel racks for my headbands. This worked for the first few fairs, until I had too many headbands to fit on the rack. My DH built me a second rack, but we quickly realized this took up a lot of table space. When we set up my products at a local salon that features local artists, the owner helped us come up with the idea of using vases for the headbands. The headbands circle the lip of the vase in a beautiful array, and decorative rocks inside serve the dual purpose of looking fancy and holding the display and tablecloths down during windy days. The only down side is that I now lug around heavy rocks in my already heavy and overloaded show tote.

At first, my masks and clips were simply laid on the table. Table space soon became scarce, and whenever the wind blew, items would fly away. DH took a picture frame, gave it a plain black back, wrapped ribbon across the front in a few places, and we clipped the clips to the ribbon. This was just barely functional. The picture frame, because it was a large, solid rectangle, blocked me from anyone on the other side. It also had the unfortunate habit of falling over frequently. After some discussion and drawing, DH made me a freestanding pegboard display. I put all my clips onto black posterboard cards and hung the cards on pegs. The only downside to this display is its weight, which I can't manage alone, and the wind, which sometimes blows the cards right off the pegs. We will probably revamp this display before next year's fair season. (Any suggestions are welcome!)

We built another freestanding display for the masks soon after building the pegboard one for the clips. We learned from our mistakes, though, and made this one smaller and hollow so it's easier to carry. Instead of pegs, we nailed clothespins to it, so the masks can be clipped into place. When I did my first indoor fair of this year, I couldn't use either of my freestanding displays, so DH built a tabletop version of the mask stand. Instead of having a flat wooden board similar to the picture frame, we made it from wooden slats, so even with the masks hanging from it I can still see customers on the other side. Luckily for me, I also have a small tabletop spinning rack that I put my clips on for the indoor show. I feel lucky to work in the industries I have in the past, as I've been able to pick up discarded displays like the spinning rack and other goodies I've used for shows. My mirror may have a brand name of hair products on it, but not too many people take notice. I use a hair stylist friend's old model head to display masks and clips on. How nice it is to have a model head with hair, not just plastic or styrofoam. She has a brand name on her too, but I give her a nice lace choker to wear and she quickly becomes anonymous.

As for signage, I'm also lucky that my DH has picked up a few things from his past jobs as well. Lovely little clips specifically meant for signs hold all my handwritten notes. (They double as great holders for items with drying glue when I'm not at shows.) My tablecloth is a simple black bed sheet, and a necklace holder discarded from a past job holds some of my more delicate headbands. I've learned to use whatever is at hand, and that a can of black spray paint can add a surprising amount of class to many things.

That's just the display aspect of the shows. There's also the driving, food, bags to put purchased items in, business cards, receipts, and of course the supplies and labor that go into the pieces themselves. Sometimes I have to take off work to be in a show, because retail jobs always require weekends, and my working weekends always seem to coincide with the best craft shows. All this time, money, and effort put into the work, the pieces, and the show... and sometimes I feel like there's so little appreciation shown for it. At one show I had a piece stolen. I've had people ask for discounts if they get several items, or if it's the last day of a two or three day festival. I've had people tell me they could get something similar for cheaper at Walmart. I price my items as low as I possibly can and still make a slight profit, and I feel my prices are definitely comparable to others who make similar handmade items. Giving discounts is not something I feel I can do and still stay in business. As for comparing my items to what you find at Walmart... well, I think I mentioned the quality issue of handmade vs. mass-produced in my last blog.

But if a show is good, if the weather is right and the crowd is feeling artsy and spendy, I can make up for all that effort and even for some of the disappointment. Two weeks ago when I did that craft fair, that was one of the ones that was worth it. I'm so appreciative of everyone who came out to see me, and to all the customers who really made my day. Picking which shows to do and which shows to skip is a science, and you guys helped me pick this one for next year too.

Sometime soon I'll have to tell you about some of the people experiences with the craft shows I've done. There are some people who really make your day, others who make you roll your eyes, and plenty of people who make you do a mental double-take or a facepalm. But that's for another post; this one's long enough already.

Listening to: The Birthday Massacre
Photos: Displays from some past shows. Feel free to suggest ideas for displays or your favorite craft shows!